Thank Steven for the egg nog!

This is what my bottles looked like after I got home this afternoon. What is it that causes us make totally stupid decisions that go against all the good stuff we've been taught? It was 12 degrees at Klondike Park in St.Charles this afternoon which was the site of Team Seagal's CXmas non-race. For whatever reason I decided earlier this week that I was doing it no matter what. Even when the predicted highs dropped from 28 to 16, I was in. Even when I started to feel the effects of a head and chest cold starting, I was in. So back to the real bad decision.



I made up two bottles with the intent to use one an hour, hoping I would finish in two-BAD IDEA- read on. The non-race was 30 miles of mostly gravel road, Katy/Hamberg, pavement with a hint of trail and unimproved gravel. We started in Klondike, rode down to the Katy, then made a left on Terry Road, Oh Terry Road. That thing is a hell of a climb! Not as steep as Matson Hill Road but certainly longer, more rollers. Then we turned onto Duke Road, a paved and also rolling road. Luckily we then turned and descended Matson Hill Road which led us back to the Katy. Miles into what seemed like a headwind brought us to the Hamberg turn off and soon our first check point. Long before this I realized that my bottles were frozen solid(effect of said bad idea), I thought about dumping them somewhere where I could retrieve them later so I wouldn't have to carry the dead weight, but never did it. Approaching the first check point I saw a table with cups stacked half-time-at-a-soccer-game style. Behind the cups I could see Pabst 12 packs and expected to have to down a cup of beer. Instead it was egg nog! If we could have a Tour De Egg Nog much like the Tour De Doughnut(which I want to try sometime), I think I would win. Not that I'm an egg nog fan, but I put that mofo down! It turned out to be my only hydration for the event which was fine. Up the Hamberg to turn into the back side of Lost Valley, I finally put some time on the fella, Ryan Heine I think, that I was swapping places with for the last 10 miles. He was on a fixed gear cross bike, I rode this. My Retrotec "Classic" that I picked up about three years ago. You know how when it's really cold all your components seem to operate "slow like", my whole bike felt slow. When I got home, I noticed my rear hub has a bearing that is locked up, done. Don't think it would have made any difference in my finish, which happened to be 4th. One place away from a coveted CXmas hat, dammit! Back to Lost Valley.

After bombing down the rough gravel downhill and suffering up the big gravel climb I approached the first "detour". It was supposed to be the "mud pit", but given the temps was the "rutted field of ice". About a mile later I came to detour #2. This one forced a dismount up onto an old foundation, over several old steel I-beams and down a couple of steps. Didn't even know that old thing was there. If you have it, click on google earth once you've opened my GPS recording of the non-race. You can see the foundation at the upper left corner of what looks like the northern loop, pretty cool! One more descent out of Lost Valley and the advantage for the mountain bike was over, all smooth from here. We crossed Hwy 94 back to the Hamberg trail. Another check point loomed ahead. You may have trouble believing this, but we were given a large, wrapped(like a Christmas present) box and told to carry it all the way back to the Terry Road and Katy junction. WTF! over. So I did. It was empty, but still a pain in the ars to carry. When I finally made it to the drop off point we also had to do a series of barricades in tall off camber grass. I was spent by then and started to cramp at the thought of lifting my heavy legs over the obstacles. After lumbering through I got back on the bike, stretched and pushed into a wicked head wind all the way to the finish. I was glad to be done, toes and fingers numb. The people with face masks had ice from frozen breath, the guys with facial hair had ice beards.

Felt ok after a half hour in Michaels Jeep with the engine running and the heated seat on. Michael did it on his urban road bike with mountain style handle bars. He only had 28mm road tires and ended up flatting once in Lost Valley and soon after a second time. He was able to nurse the second one all the way home to finish. I can not imagine changing a flat in that cold, it kills your fingers. Greg Ott did it on his only bike, a Niner One 9 single speed. Good job to both!

Thanks to Team Seagal for putting this on. It's one thing to get dressed up and ride in this weather, it's another to come out and put on an event for free. They stood out in the cold for registration, taking pictures, manning check points and waiting for everyone to finish AFTER marking the course-very well(plus clean up). Was run as well as most sanctioned events I've been to, even the "floating finish line" was cool, you had to chase it down! Mark it down for next year all youins that stayed home and ate bon bons.